Worth Noting

Today a random acquaintance called me beautiful.

She didn’t know that February was a hard month. She didn’t know that I needed to hear it. She just said it. And I did need it.

I’ve always believed that you should say the good things you’re thinking. Far too often, we speak our minds when our minds will harm and we keep silent when we think something nice about someone.

What if we started speaking up? Telling people they look nice. Telling people they made our day. Telling people how smart and valuable and lovable they are.

I remember when I started doing this–back in high school. I started with a boy I met while playing laser tag with my youth group (boy was I cool in high school). I told him he was very good at his job. And earned my first stalker.

But don’t take that as a cautionary tale. Take it as an indicator. If a simple “you’re great at what you do” incites stalking behavior, how much did that boy need to hear it? How much do we all need to hear it?

Okay…your homework: next time you think something nice about someone, say it out loud.

Part two: start looking for things you like about people. And tell them.

And, before I leave you, another anecdote: when I was in Costa Rica, I was in charge of the safety and well-being of five teenage girls. Every few days on the trip, I’d check in with them. We’d talk about what we were learning. We’d process the revelations that come with the territory of volunteering overseas. Etc.

Not all of my girls got along. Two in particular did not treat each other well.

So, in one of our meetings, I passed around five index cards. Each of them had a girl’s name on it. And each girl was to write one thing they loved or admired about the person whose name was on the card.

The two girls who had previously been enemies were stunned to find out that the other person actually liked them–admired them. And, while they never became best friends, the tension of our tiny group just melted away.

Because of a very simple exercise. That let people know they were lovable. Admirable. Worth noting.