No One Ever Eats Schnitzel with Noodles

I spent last night eating mussels and fries at a French restaurant just outside downtown Denver. With a bona fide French man (and one of my favorite lady friends and a charming Canadian).

Of course, taking a French man to an Americanized French restaurant is a rather humorous experience. First, he started greeting people as they walked in and out the door behind us–in French. A rather charming thing to do…but one that caught the Americans quite a bit off guard. They looked nervous.

We made our way to our table and ordered some wine (and there’s not much to say about the wine, as it was authentically French) and began to peruse the menu–a menu which turns on a variety of types of steamed mussels with French fries, which is, according to our French friend, a Belgian dish. And then there was the beef bourguignon, which should never be served with pasta (sacre bleu!). And the very confusing dessert menu, full of American wolves in French sheep’s clothing.

It reminded me of my visit to Vienna many years back, where I learned from a very passionate group of Austrian college students that the movie Sound of Music is an absolute travesty. No one ever eats schnitzel with noodles!

“It’s interesting to experience what Americans think is French food,” He said.

And we laughed and apologized for subjecting him to it. Of course, he was delightfully good natured and the whole evening was dripping with humor–not actual dislike or exasperation as you might expect.

I suppose it would be akin to traveling through Italy and having your new Italian friends take you to an American restaurant where they served the hamburgers with peas mixed in or the hot dogs with a dollop of marinara sauce.