Gigi: Put that man-thigh away. Man thigh is the least attractive part of a man’s body.
K-Diggity: I don’t know…balls are pretty ugly.
Relatively Dashing Roommate: As an owner of balls, I agree.
gigi griffis
My name is Gigi. I’m mostly a writer and strategist, but I also do websites, drink fine wines and buy polka dotted things with some frequency. Obviously, I also blog. Read More.
"People need stories more than bread itself. They tell us how to live, and why." -Arabian Nights
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Archive for the ‘isms’ Category
Me: I was reading a blog today–one of my favorites–about a man who is bicycling through Africa. And he was telling the story of how he chose a road that the maps indicated led to his next destination, only to discover that it ended at a large river. Then, and this is the part that I love, because it is so very incredibly crazy and uncareful, he wades into the river to see how deep it is. And I’ll remind you, this is a river IN AFRICA. And it’s murky. And guess what lives in Africa? Crocodiles. He mentions, in passing, in the entry, that he thought this would be an ideal place to find saltwater crocs if they live in that part of Africa, which he didn’t know.
Relatively Dashing Roommate: I find it funny how foreigners think. We go into a situation and do something stupid and dangerous and say “look at me! I’m like a native.” But no, you’re more like a retarded native.
Me: Exactly! Do you notice any locals in the river? No, you do not.
[A well-dressed woman in bright pink with a tiny, fluffy white dog sporting a big pink bow walks toward me.]
Me: Well, she’s just beautiful.
Her: He.
Me: Oh, he…
Her: He really likes pink. He’s gay.
“Listening to my family is like taking advice from a hobo.” - Adam Corolla, Loveline back in the day
8:25AM: Bed made, water boiling…I toss on a black top and cute black and blue skirt, grab my book and head for the kitchen.
8:35AM: Tea is officially seeped, so out I go for my morning tea and reading on the patio. Luna, afraid of trucks in the alley, declines to join me.
9:16AM: I finish the second part of the BTK serial killer book and move inside to put together my June social media reports before diving back into my keyword/site map project.
11:23AM: Lunch time! The final third of my burrito leftovers (those big burritos from Chipotle or Qdoba are a good three meals for me…I have no idea how Americans have gotten to the point where they can eat the whole thing in one sitting) is calling my name.
12:01PM: I realize it’s time to leave and drive down to my therapy appointment…scramble around grabbing keys and directions and my book, and head out the door a few minutes late.
12:50PM: My therapist (who just happens to be the Best Therapist in the World) and I discuss dealing with emotionally chaotic people and intrusive, boundary-less people. She’s always so insightful.
2:38PM: Feeling like I’m constantly on the go this week (and realizing that there’s no way this strategy document is going to be finished today anyway), I return home and retreat again to my back patio. My sanctuary. I’ll just spend some more time reading and give myself permission not to be a workaholic overachiever.
3:30PM: I finish Inside the Mind of BTK, which was mostly intriguing and fascinating (with some interspersed boring parts about the author being up in the middle of the night and imagining corpses). It’s time to move on to my next serial killer book (I’m sensing a theme in July’s reading schedule): Darkly Dreaming Dexter.
5:01PM: A call from my graphic designer/developer partner interrupts my Dexter bliss and we go over estimates for our lengthy non-profit proposal, which I’ll be somehow finding time for this weekend. Yikes.
6:45PM: BonBon arrives for a night of white wine, then cold beer on the back patio (until the spiders and wasps drive us inside). We talk about all the usual things:
The road they’re talking about building through the Serengeti (can you believe that? Giving poachers direct access to the animals, cutting off migration patterns…all for what? Easy access to the mines…?),
The ways childhood trauma affect people in their adult lives (particularly in relationships)
How sad it is to see so many people settling for less than they want from life…
Etc.
8:44PM: BonBon, in a fit of passion, exclaims (about men who have nothing going for them and thus are hiring prostitutes): “Go to the gym. Lay off the weed. Quit drinking so much. Quit smoking. And try to be something a woman might actually want to touch!”
11:35PM: I’m alone in my house again (except for a very sleepy Luna). As I climb into bed, I make sure all noise-making devices in my house (phone, alarm) are set to silent. It’s a Saturday tomorrow and I’m going to sleep in. Well, maybe.